Nothing Says I love you more than toilet paper roll
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January 24, 2020
Ah, Valentine’s Day.
It’s sweet (literally). 💋
It’s romantic. 🏹
It’s a made-up holiday. 💖💕❤️
However you feel about V-Day, it IS nice to set aside some time to shower your significant other with love and appreciation—even if we need a Hallmark holiday to force us into it.
But like any holiday (made-up or otherwise), Valentine’s Day comes with a lot of expectations: fancy candlelit dinners, thoughtful presents, sexy lingerie…
There’s nothing wrong with any of those things (especially if that fancy candlelit dinner includes a molten chocolate cake) — but it can all feel very…
Love CAN BE sweet and romantic—and yes, serious at times—but plenty of relationships are ALSO full of good-natured teasing, and dirty jokes, laughing so hard your abs get sore.
These gifts are for you. 😘😘😘
Awww! See, this is the ideal combination of sweet & sassy. A cute, cuddly teddy bear that ALSO has a flirty lil’ message. (And it’s safe to leave out in case company comes over, unlike some other things on this list. ;) )
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… it also comes in a keychain!
Surprise him during his morning “reading time” with this cheeky toilet paper (see what we did there?) In addition to a surprise expression of love in a place he least expects in (omg we can’t stop) — you get the added bonus of making him search around for the “real” toilet paper when he’s done poopin.
Suggest a casual night in with pizza and a movie, and offer to pick up the pizza on your way home from work. Leave the pizza in the car, and when your significant other asks, “Where’s the pizza?” give them this. 😂
But then you should go get the actual pizza out of your car, or it’ll smell like pizza for the rest of the week.
This one is perfect if your relationship is too new for poop jokes (oh, the fun that awaits you!). It’s cute, it’s flirty, and it’s actually something they can use.
Hey-yo! Things just got steamy. This 1.5” token comes in a velvet bag so he won’t know what it is ‘til he opens it. Plus, as one of our lady customers pointed out, “It’s better quality than I expected it to be.” Lol.
Remind your man what a man he is by inserting your insatiable desire for him into his manly hammering time.
(PSA: Women hammer — and nail — things too.)
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March 26, 2020
Let’s get right into it. There are a lot of… unforeseen side effects of a global health crisis.
Like, when you’re the CFO of a medium-sized startup company, but then you have to work from home, and also teach 2nd grade. Or when the catering manager of a large grocery store chain suddenly becomes a first responder, because grocery stores are CRAZY TOWN right now.
There’s a lot going on right now, and much of it is pretty grim. As usual, Seymour Butz is here to provide a bit of levity in an otherwise serious time.
March 12, 2020
March 05, 2020
Hooray! Your friend(s) recently purchased a new home! And boooo — that means you have to pick out ANOTHER housewarming present. Do your top three ideas involve plants, candles, artisan bread, and/or a bottle of wine?
So we did you a favor and pulled together 7 hilarious housewarming gift ideas that NO ONE else will think of.